Reclamation, Not Transformation

Reclamation, Not Transformation

There is a phrase that I keep returning to in my head: reclamation, not transformation. It is always there.

As a coach, the word ‘transformation’ gets used a lot. You also begin to hear it a lot around this time of year, especially as we move closer to January and the whole ‘New Year, New You’ narrative that gets bandied about.

Now, do not get me wrong; transformation can be powerful. I consider my Silver Spiral training, where I dedicated as a Priestess, to be life-changing and therefore, maybe, transformational. I stepped into a new role as a Priestess, dedicated my life to be in service to Goddess and it has literally changed my life, enriched it, and added a new dimension. However, at my core, I am still me. I did not seek out, nor expect, such a powerful experience. I am, however, truly grateful for it.

So why do I not consider Sacred Reclamation to be transformational?

It is an interesting question, isn’t it? I firmly believe that we do not need to become somebody new in order to reclaim the life we want. We may simply have lost sight of parts of ourselves through the choices we have made, the circumstances we have experienced, or the demands and expectations of everyday life.

It is something that can happen so gradually that we barely notice it. But what if, within your life, you have become lost beneath all the roles, responsibilities and maybe labels that you carry and now you want to get some of your life back? That is not transformation. It is not about going backwards either, returning to a different time. It is about moving forward in a way that gives you space and, maybe more importantly, permission to put yourself in the centre of your world. To be your true, sovereign self.

Transformation suggests becoming somebody new. For me, reclamation suggests becoming more fully who you are.

I also believe that there can be a lot of pressure and expectation attached to the word transformation, especially within the coaching and wellness worlds. For example, ‘I am going to transform my life’ or, ‘I am going to transform into the person I always wanted to be’. Yet, when you look in the mirror, you are still the same person looking back at you, underneath it all.

You cannot escape the very core of who you are. You cannot run from it either. What you can do, though, is reconcile. Accept. Learn. And move on. And that is where reclamation can also come in. Learning to love and accept yourself so you can reclaim the parts of you that maybe you have abandoned, walked away from, perhaps because you did not feel worthy, did not have the confidence, or maybe you felt you could not embrace them until you had achieved x, y, or z.

So, when someone asks me if my coaching is transformational, I usually hesitate before I answer. You are not likely to become somebody new through it, but you are likely to live more intentionally and in alignment with who you truly are. That feels both different and beautiful.

So maybe we do not need to become somebody new. Perhaps we simply need to give ourselves permission to recognise, accept and fully embrace the woman we already are.

What do you think?